Dumplings at Neil Road...

Last night after I got home... We talked on MSN alittle...

Got another call this morning... at about 11am...
we went out for lunch...
this dumpling place at Neil Road...

The dumplings were good...
the company was better...

we walked to Tanjong Pagar MRT together...
*she asked if she could hold my hand...*
I didn't mind...

we spent the rest of the day at her place...
watched a DVD...
we just hung out...

it was a nice way to get back together again...

(from memory I think I spent the night over at her place... though I can't really remember... )

I am happy. I am sad. I am upset. I am crazy. I am happy... I am sad again...

My love,

My heart skips a beat each time the phone rings. My lips curl into a smile when I see that it’s you calling….

Rough roads ahead? Well we’re just gonna have to travel together, won’t we?

I am happy. I am sad. I am upset. I am crazy. I am happy again.

I am happy.

And I am crazy about you too.

Quoted from : www.spunkymonkee.com

Different Types of Friends...

Was just pondering...

After meeting up with an old aquaintance, I'd realised that I've got lots of different kinds of friends. Maybe for a while, I've confused them and have idealised on what I want and need friends to be. Thus neglecting them or not telling them things that are close to my heart.

Some are good time friends, just around enough for the good times. These bunch are around for the pool playing and sometimes getting drinks and stuff. Nothing really serious... cannot talk to most of them except one or two... even then... there are times when there's a kinda warming up period to these one or two...

Then there are the very close friends, people who are around you lots... People who are close to your heart. I've got one. She's great... we talk lots... she shares a lot... I try to share... but at times even with her... I'm guarded... I dunno why... almost like I'm afraid that she'd see right through me... or judge me... or something... *this kills me inside...*

Then like today... I meet an old aquaintance... Julian, an old friend of a friend... met through some dumb MLM thing a couple of years ago... we talk about loads... like off road bicycles... and our old friend Lynn... today when I met him.... I just unloaded on him... I dunno... maybe it's because I know that he won't know anyone involved in my life... or the fact that he's leaving for Brisbane to work... I told him and felt better... He must think I'm crazy...

Still aching...
a little too afraid to think about possibilities...
I've spoken to her... we're going to meet up next week to see how everything 'feels' then decide...
I've got to hang loose in the meantime...

Below is something that AP said when we had dinner yesterday...
coming from him... I dare say that he should be pretty spot on...

"She's been living alone for so long, happily.
She's financially independent,
She has her own place,
She technically doesn't need a man to weigh her down...
Just wait till she gets a little older when her friends are all getting married...
Then she'll start feeling different about a proper relationship... "

AP 040506

Mark out...

PS was talking to AM and thinking and reviewing memories last night... and realised that I missed some deeper messages in the things that she had said... she did try to re-assure me through last week...

* I feel stupid*

Capítulo dos?

Will speak to her...
I've moved in too quickly...
rushed things totally...
I don't know why...
Have I been alone for too long??

Anyways...
I also realised that I have not been reading between the lines enough...
she's been saying really reassuring things...
I just didn't hear it right...

I'm going to call her...
and talk to her..

Will take things easy this time though...
Wish me luck...

soy triste... Es el final del capítulo uno...

It's been a crazy 2 weeks...
All in all...
has been maybe a week when I was crazy about her...
and another week when she was crazy about me...

I had a good time with her...
I saw in her many attributes that I want to see in my future partner...
I was happy.

yet I realised somewhere along the line that though we're so much the same...
when it comes down to long term relationship 'goals'...
we differ almost totally...

I didn't know that 2 people who never got together can actually break-up...
I especially didn't know that I would have fallen so much for her in only 3weeks or so...
I feel worse now than with Val then...
Maybe with Val i knew it was the end of the road... that it would just never ever work out...

now with her...
we're moving on without allowing thing's to fully progress...
I think that is what's truely urking me...
is that I saw so much potential in us but I was foolish to rush things...

I'm seriously thinking of moving in again to re-start another chapter...
should I??

Should I let lying dog's lie?

Should I strike when the fire is hot?

I want to give it a week...
I don't know if i can...

I'm really feeling horrible...

Time After Time

Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick,

And think of you

Caught up in circles

Confusion is nothing new

Flashback, warm nights.

Almost left behind

Suitcases of memories,

Time after -

Sometimes you picture me

I'm walking too far ahead

You're calling to me,

I can't hear

What you've said

Then you say, go slow

I fall behind

The second hand unwinds

If you're lost you can look

and you will find me

Time after time

If you fall I will catch you

I'll be waiting

Time after time

After my picture fades

and darkness has turned to gray

Watching through windows

I'm wondering If you're okay

You said go slow

The drum beats out of time

I fall behind

The second hand unwinds