Muted - A Definition.

Everyone has their own pains... sometimes its about war, or being in one... sometimes it's about exams, or studying to much for one... sometimes its about love, or lack thereof...

Most of the time... all these feelings are just kept inside... in the deepest crevices of one's heart... muted...

I HAVE A PROBLEM.
I have an inability to share. Even to my closest friends. I dare say most people I know don't know me. I don't blame them. I've never allowed them.

I AM A CLOSET PERFECTIONIST
I am a closet perfectionist with tunnel vision. For the things that I can allow myself to see I want to perfect. But in the event that I deem the task imposible, I give up. almost totally.


Why all of this, all of a sudden you may ask... well, I'm trying to open up. Share my feelings with my closest friends. It's really hard though... all the years as a single child has taken it's toll... I'm still trying...

Thank you my dear friends for showing me that I've got issues to handle and for being patient with me. I'll try not to let you down.

** today I'm feeling especially small... its amazing what a little room full of semi-attractive gyrating people can do to a man.**